96.1 FM, 780 AM, Yours for Western Alaska

How to Fight a Dementor Attack

It’s not just me, long standing Nomites agree as well: it is too cold, snowy, and miserable in Nome for this to be spring, even by Alaskan standards. Well, duh. That’s because this is not a matter of temperamental Alaskan weather or global warming.

This is obviously a full blown Dementor attack.

Think about it. It’s cold and overcast. We feel like happiness is being sucked right of us and we can’t even see the true culprit responsible for this. As many of us know, the only way to fight Dementors is to conjure a Patronus Charm, and the only way to conjure a patronus is think of your happiest memory ever. That’s a lot of pressure to put on people when they are already absolutely miserable, but personally, I refuse to go down without a fight. So let’s start small, one small happy memory at a time.

Daynee’s Not-So-Secret Dementor Fighting Techniques:

LAUGHTER

Babies with mustaches. My best friend once said that there was nothing funnier than a baby with a mustache and she is right. The next best thing is a baby with a beard.

CATS. This is coming from a dog person: watch a cat do something crazy on the Internet. Don’t discriminate between videos and pictures and don’t be judgmental of poor grammar. There is a cat out there for everyone. My favorite is Henri, the existential cat:

 

RANDOM DISTRACTIONS

Dancing yellow chick. This is basically a solar-powered mechanical yellow chick sitting by the window at the volunteer house. All it does is move back and forth. Bored? Depressed? Stare at this chick for a few minutes. I guarantee your life perspective will change.

Wearing fun hats. There is a reason why British soldiers wore pith helmets. I’ll give you a hint: for the same reason why I own one of these babies.

Comfort food (aka Chocolate). This is a temporary solution and not a healthy long-term thing, but even Remus Lupin gave Harry Potter some chocolate after his first Dementor attack. Candy heals.

Daynee on Sue & Pat's piano

Movement. Hiking, running, dancing, walking. Do something. Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don’t shoot their husbands. Or, um, get depressed.

CREATIVE ENDEVOURS

Music. I am not a performer. In fact, I think the only reason I ever started playing music was for therapeutic purposes. Nothing makes me feel better in such short bursts of time than playing or listening to music. At the very least it distracts me from whatever crazy thing Mother Nature is doing outside my door.

Writing. Like music but doesn’t require you to know how to play an instrument. It’s also cheap and accessible, so there’s no reason not to try it.

Toast Robot. I cannot explain what this creature is. It is neither toast nor robot. It’s more like a joyous piece of popcorn. I drew it when I first arrived in Nome and it has since grown to be a sort of meme synonymous with whatever nonsensical thing I do or say.

PEOPLE

Old friends. They know your ins and outs, what makes you smile, what makes you tick. Don’t let go of old connections because of distance. They know what dementors are and how to fight them.

Old Friends

3am ice cream run. We all need crazy people to do crazy things with.

New friends. You may not have a history with these people but don’t rule them out because of it. They may understand you better than you think.

Fighting Dementors= Hard.

I’m not even going to pretend that coming up with this list didn’t take over an hour, nor am I going to pretend that talking about Dementors isn’t super nerdy. But writing this list cheered me up a bit. Maybe the whole think-of-something-happy thing isn’t your thing, and that’s cool. All I hope is that wherever you are, if you are under attack, you have something or someone to help you through it. In the very least I hope I can provide you with as many cat videos as it takes, however many times it takes.